#30DaystoSanity Days 2, 3, and 4 Re-Cap

Right, so, one of the things about re-prioritizing your digital life is that, you know, you re-prioritize.

You close your laptop or turn off your phone or you spend time with real people instead of profile pictures. These are all good, good things, I'm finding. WHO KNEW. (ahem, sarcasm)

I've worked hard to shut down and shut off these last few days. In the meantime, I've started on a pretty beefy short-term project for work. Making "work time, work time" means that my work time has extended hours for the next week or so, which, funnily enough, makes it a lot easier to follow some of the other Rules of the Challenge. 

For the past few days, when I needed a break or had a few extra minutes, I sat down at the piano (to learn some new jazz chords) or I went for a run (to pretend that ice cream I had didn't happen), rather than check Twitter or race through my Google Reader. I'm still going through withdrawal a bit and feel somewhat "out of the loop" but it doesn't feel too much like a loss, which is totally fine with me. 

(On the other hand, I'm TOTALLY losing the Tab Battle. I mean, complete failure every day on that front. If I could somehow receive a worse grade than F, it'd be here.)

Otherwise, I'm hunkering down on work stuff, but making time for creativity and physical activity. And despite the fact that I'll be working most of the weekend, I don't feel as crazy as I normally would about it all. YAY!

ACTUALLY, I'm coming to realize that my overall insanity over digital stuff is--GASP--probably just me. It's not simply that the world is moving faster, it's the INSANE FACT that I would even attempt to keep up, or feel inadequate for not keeping up, or feel less successful somehow because I didn't Tweet 20 random articles in day.

So fine, Internet. It's not you, it's me.

We'll call it progress. 

#30DaystoSanity Day 1 Re-Cap and Gift for You!

We have arrived at the start of our challenge! And while I can't say that Day One of 30 Days to Sanity was a complete success (I currently have 10 tabs open. Oops. It's for post-writing! I swear!), I at least took the opportunity to slow down, catch myself when I was multi-tasking, and do one thing at a time.

Here's how I did:

+No multi-tasking, check (texting and driving doesn't count! Haha, I kid).

+Do something creative, sort of check (I didn't do it away from the computer).

+Read only five websites/posts, check (I only read three! Ish! Yippee!)

+Keep Work Time, Work Time, check (I did spend six hours of my day in the car today, so that kind of helped with the old "shut off.")

+Try new things...well, not here yet, but soon.

All-in-all, if I had to give myself a score, it'd be a C, which isn't terrible for the first day, right? RIGHT?!?!

Before I head off to do fun, relaxing things, like NOT READ THE INTERNET, I'd like to share the dose of creativity I had today. It was inspired by my hair this morning, which was mildly inspired by something on Pinterest. I was hoping for beautiful curls, and instead ended up looking like this guy:

So I was inspired to make this. I feel like it needs to be on a t-shirt:

It is my gift to you. I know you shall love it.

What about you? I saw some Tweets about progress (lots of open tabs. I know your pain), techniques (did I see a Toggl mention!?), and progress. I would love to hear more! 

Comment below, or Tweet me!

Brief Announcement: In Case You Were Wondering, I'm not Danielle LaPorte

***BREAKING NEWS TO SELF: Google stuff before you "start something" you think is cool, Self!***

I quite literally JUST discovered that someone way more famous than I is also doing some 30 Days to Whatnot thing, and a few people are getting the hashtags mixed up.

HAHAHAHA...FUCK.

So I would just like to take this little moment to tell you, Internet, that I had no idea that Danielle LaPorte was doing her 30 Day challenge thingy on the friggin' Huffington Post. Any resemblance to #30daystosanity is purely coincidental, because I don't read her stuff or follow her anywhere, nor does she read mine. I'm sure she is quite lovely, and I bet she is just wonderful and I'm PRETTY SURE she'd say the same about me (snort), but yeah. Just a mix up.

Now back to your regularly scheduled programming, I guess?

The First Day of the Rest of My Life...Begins Tomorrow

When it comes to starting the 30 Day Sanity Challenge tomorrow, I am both pumped and slightly terrified.

While I think most people perceive me as pretty easy-going (I'm not going to fight you over which restaurant we go to, and if you'd rather we go solo or with a group of friends, no big deal to me), I'm finding that on the inside? I don't deal as well with change as I'd like.

Which means, I'm totally like a cat after a big move. I'll act kind of normal and cuddly and sweet on the outside, but in the meantime I'm peeing on your bed. 

So when I look at my Google Reader, and it looks like this...

...and I know tomorrow that I've gotta cut to much, much less than that (what's 1,000+ minus five?), it's hard to make complete sense of.

The sucky thing is, I work at being self-aware enough to understand that I'm less afraid of the external change of routine, and much, much more nervous about what sort of whatnot re-focusing my mind and throwing out digital clutter will dredge up.

Because I know that I'm much more tied to the frenzy than I'd like...frenzy, in fact, allows me to avoid a whole-shit ton of accountability and responsibility with the things that really matter.

Of course, you all get to come along for that ride as I soul-puke it here. Let the meltdown begin. :)

Anyway, enjoy your last few hours of willy-nilly clicking around, tab opening, and generally feeling frazzled. If you're like me, you're on a binge like it's December 31, and you resolved to lose one hundred pounds starting January 1.

See you tomorrow! #30DaystoSanity

So, You're In...Now What

One of the reasons I like the Internet is because, no matter what you're going through, you're bound to find people who are going through the same thing.

Enter, #30DaystoSanity. And lo, a bunch o' yous are like, "Um, word, me too and stuff."

Well, some of your responses were more accurately...

And some of you were more like, "Yay, group challenge!" (which is awesome)...

And some of you were...well, you'll see...

And still others were like, "30 days!?! NOT LONG ENOUGH."

To which, of course, the only response is...

Anyway, all that to say, thanks to all of you who responded here, on Twitter and elsewhere. I think we're going have a great time. A really tough, challenging time, but great, nonetheless. :)

Just a few more days! 

30 Days to Sanity Challenge

A few weeks ago, I wrote that I am in full-blown information overload mode.

Not only do I feel like a crazy person all the time, unable to focus, and not any smarter than I was yesterday from everything I'm supposedly taking in...

...I'm having a harder and harder time in my daily life connecting to the part of myself that is capable of creating. And I think it's because in my quest to be everywhere all the time, I've un-learned how to really focus, be present and quiet my mind.

So here's what I'mma try to do. I can't stay away from the Interwebz completely--my job would probably be real upset with me if I did--but I'd like to take the next 30 days to shape up, re-focus, and clear my brain. (And I would LOVE if you could join me.)

Here are the rules (you can view the short version here): 

No more Digital Multi-tasking

The Short of It: Do one thing at a time, and one thing only. 

The Long of It: I have a bad browser tab habit. At any given time, I have AT LEAST two tabs open (Hootsuite and Gmail), and have had up to twenty or more open depending on links I've clicked on and "need" to read.

During the 30 Day Sanity Challenge, I am cutting out digital multi-tasking. This means only having one tab open at a time (unless required otherwise for work purposes, obvs), and focusing on one article, Website, Social Platform or work task at a time. No exceptions. I'm reading the whole Tweet, the whole post, the whole article before moving on to something else. 

Throughout the 30 days, I'll experiment with and recommend different focusing techniques (and report on them to you!), but rest assured, I'll use the Pomodoro technique primarily when I need to focus on output and production. It's the best tool I've used to date to get shit done.

Adopt The "Five Blog Rule" 

The Short of It: Choose no more than five blogs/websites as a daily "must read." Do not read or click through to any other links, no matter how tempting. 

The Long of It: My Google Reader is routinely stuck at over 1,000 unread posts. There is no effing way I can read them all, let alone retain all that information.

For 30 Days to Sanity, I'm choosing five blogs and/or websites to read, and cutting out the rest. I know, I know, I might miss something, and I know it'll mean cutting out a lot of my favorites. But if I'm to re-learn how to focus and to quiet my mind, then I'm going to need to "cleanse" for a minute.

You know, like a crazy fad diet where you still get to eat bacon.

(Of course, I'll keep you posted on which ones I choose. :))

Keep Work Time, Work Time

The Short of It: Give work a solid start/end time, and stick to it.

The Long of It: If you're like me, you may find that your work time and social time has tumbled drunkenly into bed together at the end of a long day.

Um, or not.

Anyway, I do find myself working at odd hours of the night, or socializing during odd times of the day. And not that any of this is bad, necessarily, but I'd like to see if I can structure my work day better to have clear cut times for work/social time/relaxation.

So for 30 days, I plan to have a strictly set work day. At my desk by 8 am, work no later than 6 pm. Or whatever. I'll let you know before things get started what I decide. 

Make Creativity and Physical Activity a Daily Practice

The Short of It: Take 1-2 hours a day to practice a skill, create something new, and move.

The Long of It: I mentioned a few weeks ago that I felt rusty. Nearly half my life was devoted to piano lessons, and when I sit down now, my fingers are sluggish and slow and contrary. I'd like to get back to practicing the piano or even learning a new instrument, and I've got to make time for running and the gym again. (I've been sporadically visiting, but nothing like I used to do). 

For the 30 Days to Sanity Challenge, I'm dedicating at least an hour a day away from the computer pursuing something creative and one hour doing something active. 

Try Three New Things

The Short of It: Try three things that either terrify you, intrigue you, or that you've been putting off.

The Long of It: I have lived in my current apartment for a year and a half, and I STILL have not put my name tag on my mailbox. Part of me is all hipster-rebellious about it now, like, "I'm not doing that shit." Except...it's kinda rude to the mailman, and to my guests, and it's stupid, because it would literally take 30 seconds to do it. 

I've also been meaning to go swing dancing at a local place for months and months, and this kind lady has offered to go with me several times, and I either forget, or don't make time, or get too busy with work stuff. 

Well no more. Three things in a month is not a terribly demanding task, and it'll open my horizons and help me get that feeling of accomplishment I rarely have these days. 

***

So! I'm starting the 30 Days to Sanity Challenge next Tuesday, May 1 and if you'd like, you're welcome to join me! I'll blog daily about how it's going, give you tips and tricks from what I'm learning, as well as provide resources as I have them. 

If you'd like to join, comment below or Tweet. I'll be happy to also share your progress to other readers, especially what you're creating in your new, carved out creativity time. :)

So whaddya say? You in? Comment below or Shoot me a Tweet to let me know you want to participate, and use hashtag #30DaystoSanity!

Complicated

"Relationships are really complicated," she said, pushing her food around with her fork.

We'd been discussing people and friendships. I wondered out loud if there was something wrong with me. Maybe I was the kind of person who didn't need anyone until I REALLY NEEDED someone...and maybe people didn't want to wait around to feel needed on my terms. Maybe they wanted to feel needed in small, consistent doses, rather than one big influx of sobbing, snotty-nosed NEED.

Maybe not. (And if it is that, I have no idea how to turn off my (aura of) total self-reliance until, of course, I am no longer self-reliant and instead am just a big fucking mess. I have found that people are better with steady helpings of mess. That, they can get used to. But no problems for a long time followed by BIG PROBLEMS for a short time is jarring. Maybe people feel like that's more than they signed on for when they decided they wanted to be friends.)

"We grow and we change. Sometimes people change with us, sometimes they don't."

She was right, but I still worried about it. I can't imagine that all the friendships that have fallen by the wayside are simply an unspoken, mutual agreement that, "This probably won't go any further." There has to be SOMETHING I could do better, right?

On the other hand, friendships are weird because in a lot of ways, they're similar to romantic relationships except for two things: no sex (usually) and no clean break-ups/endings (usually). So that means a dying friendship-type-relationship can hang on and on and on because there's not impetus to say formally, "This isn't working for me anymore."

(And, oh yeah, you can't follow THAT up with, "Let's just be friends," because, let's face it, that is never true in any break-up case*. Can we just be honest and start saying, "This isn't working...and what I really want is for you to leave me alone.")

All that to say, I'm glad that my friendships that are working are working. I'm sure with a little more digging and soul-searching, I could figure out better why the ones that don't, don't.

But, with all relationships, that would be just one side of the story. You know, "Two to tango," and all that.

*For whatever reason, I'm still friends with my significant exes. I'm pretty sure it's because I hold such a special, special place in their hearts. 

SNORT. 

Bunnies

There is a family of bunnies that lives in the backyard of my apartment fourplex. They essentially live in plain site, barely concealed under a tangle of weeds surrounding a tree. Sometimes I'll spot a little guy crouched there, motionless, camouflaged, staring straight ahead and sending out a quiet, rabbity vibe that, "Of course you do not see me, human. Move along."

I found one of the babies by the trash the other day. It was a tiny thing, lying on its side, stretched out long like it was in mid-bound. I don't know how it got there, or why it died. There didn't appear to be any damage or cause for its passing. In fact, it just kind of looked like it laid down, stretched out and was just hoping to take a little rest. 

It bothered me a lot to see it there. I hated passing by it when I would take the dogs for a walk. It reminded me of darker, sad things, stuff that we pretend isn't happening all around us every day, because if we really thought about it all in depth, and how useless we are to protect everything and everyone from hurtful things, we'd curl up in our beds and never leave. 

Its little body was finally gone this morning. I was glad. It's not like I imagined that it was bounding in a happier place. I was just grateful that the absence of the reminder of its death meant that my daily walks could be a little less sad.

Maybe that makes me a bad person. "Out of sight, out of mind."

I'd like to think that there's only so many dead baby bunnies one can see in a week and still keep a bounce in one's step. I don't think that makes me bad...just human.

Information Overload

One of the best things to happen to me in the recent past was to find myself without a TV. 

I had just moved into my first "big girl all by myself" apartment, newly single, and television-less. At first, it didn't matter much. I was busy with work and moving and a few side projects and whoring. 

Then, it didn't matter at all once I figured out that anything I wanted to watch was usually readily available via Hulu or live streaming. 

I discovered it was really nice to not be tied to an arbitrary schedule created by someone else. "I have to be home by this time because my favorite show is on, and tonight we find out if Whats-her-face's lover is really a cyborg!"'

For just about a year, my laptop was my TV. I'd crank on a nearly commercial free show and dick around on Twitter or write a blog post or do whatever other multi-tasking is responsible for the complete inability to focus on one thing for more than 25 minutes at a time (thank gods for Pomodoro). 

In the fall, friends gave me a really nice TV with a really broken cable output. I bought a Roku and an HDMI cord. And now, when I feel like it, I watch an episode or two of something, or work my way, systematically and obsessively, through approximately 573 episodes of Hoarders.

All that to say, I often walk a fine line between "information" and "information overload". Part of my work entails being plugged in to "what's happening" in my field and elsewhere through Social Media. There are days I want to throw my computer against the wall and cry...I can't possibly keep up with it all, and I don't understand the people who can. Are they sleeping? Do they have some sort of Matrix port in the back of their necks that allow them to understand Pinterest analytics and learn kung-fu at the same time?

I think perhaps I'm learning that I'm an individual who both needs and craves some sort of quiet space while also, paradoxically, fighting to stay "in the loop". This, as you might guess, makes me feel like a crazy person, oh, all the damn time. 

There is still part of me that enjoys the rare weekend where all I hear is the click of the "next page" button on my Kindle. 

Photo Credit

Linkapalooza: Animalistic

Well, I just couldn't help it. All these links are kitten, puppy and animal-tastic. I guess I just found too many good ones to pass up this week.

First, your unicorn.

Next, text from dog.

Kitten vs. kitten. It's a kitten war. (thanks @torn_angel!)

And, pelvic thrusting cats.

French dog, french cat.

Animals who are extremely disappointed in you.

For the musical animal in your man.

Feel pretty seal.

"May the peace of Christ be with you." Erin makes me laugh. (PS--it counts because there is a lamb)

Bunnies. Delicious, delicious bunnies.

Everything on ZooBorns, ever.

This video makes me feel like an animal inside. I know they're playing brothers, but how is this the hottest thing I've ever seen? Oh my with that tension!

Animal. Mama. Animal.

Happy Friday!